Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize