so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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