the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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