just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
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