Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
