i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
