She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
