Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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