I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I had to cum in my sink.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
