Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
