People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
