I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize