Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
COCAINE IS GR8
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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