already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
