Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
