I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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