Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
