Three words: puerto rican gang bang
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
