in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
