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Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
thus making me awesome and them whores
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
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