you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize