O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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