im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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