I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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