Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  did you get my message about your dog?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  no... is he ok?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry

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  (248): did you get my message about your dog? (1-248): no... is he ok? (248): no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry http://tfl.nu/keer
  Replies (16) Good night (698) Bad night (2904)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.

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  (541): im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine. http://tfl.nu/y6yn
  Replies (10) Good night (4105) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.

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  (757): I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling. http://tfl.nu/uymu
  Replies (6) Good night (1053) Bad night (2239)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.

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  (612): only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday. http://tfl.nu/1ia2
  Replies (82) Good night (1243) Bad night (4768)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"

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  (603): sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!" http://tfl.nu/halh
  Replies (7) Good night (1437) Bad night (3969)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?

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  (250): Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom? http://tfl.nu/cirg
  Replies (72) Good night (18246) Bad night (2775)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me

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  (617): She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me http://tfl.nu/0bof
  Replies (4) Good night (1436) Bad night (3258)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up

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  (630): I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up http://tfl.nu/11fq
  Replies (3) Good night (2343) Bad night (1098)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.

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  (250): I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you. http://tfl.nu/i94o
  Replies (6) Good night (1897) Bad night (1298)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.

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  (316): Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all. http://tfl.nu/i7x5
  Replies (5) Good night (1179) Bad night (1216)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.

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  (610): I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions. http://tfl.nu/ms2p
  Replies (12) Good night (935) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Hows the party lookin?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party

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  (608): Hows the party lookin? (414): At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party http://tfl.nu/v0wb
  Replies (3) Good night (1083) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"

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  (303): So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode" http://tfl.nu/uekw
  Replies (3) Good night (883) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.

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  (224): I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog. http://tfl.nu/7iet
  Replies (0) Good night (678) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.

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  (906): Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle. http://tfl.nu/e62g
  Replies (0) Good night (556) Bad night (254)

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