p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
