At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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