I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
