I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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