He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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