it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
