I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Come see our sink grown plant.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
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