Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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