He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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