just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
