she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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