watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public