I feel like I'm in dance class right now
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
