i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
