Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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