i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
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After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
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still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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