whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
