I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
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