I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
