Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
birth control should be required to get into college
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
