hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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