some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize