my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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