idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
