i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
