they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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