i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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