I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
